My wonderful colleague, sex therapist Paul Nelson, recently posted a great video featuring the pitfalls of “date night”. He made some great points about why the way most people choose to enjoy one another outside of the house isn’t all that effective when it comes to reigniting intimacy (If you haven’t seen it, please click HERE).
As Paul says, dinner is the date night choice of the masses. It’s easy to understand why. But if you’re looking to expand your horizons and your connection to your partner, here are some other suggestions that will fight the bloat and the intoxication (both of which do no favors for your sex life, BTW):
- Think Novelty – Don’t just go out to for a meal. Think about engaging in something totally new. If you live in a big city, the possibilities are endless, but even if you don’t, surely there is an activity or location that’s new to both of you. Ax throwing, a cooking class, a movie theatre that has cushy seats and serves booze, an art gallery stroll, a batting cage, monster mini golf, a concert – I could go on forever.
- Be Creative – Your date doesn’t have to be centered around an actual activity. Sometimes it’s not about the what, but about the where. How about a hike? A walk on the beach? A road trip without a specific destination? Hell, you could just pack a picnic dinner, drive to a pretty spot, rev up the tunes and take in the view.
- Be Nostalgic (But Not Boring) – While you do want to avoid the same old same old, a touch of something that reminds you both of what’s important can go a long way. Music is a perfect mechanism by which to interject a little sentimentality and to get the warm & fuzzies going. Curate a playlist for your car ride – it’s a great way to demonstrate your commitment to this special time with your partner. Or take a route that leads you to an old stomping ground on your way to a new one.
I would encourage flexibility as you contemplate the above recommendations – best laid plans, blah blah blah (and of course, be cognizant of COVID protocols in your area). If things don’t work out, then find the levity in the situation and try again next time. The point is to keep going. Moving forward fights complacency, the enemy of long-term relationships.
For more information or guidance about your sexual health, contact us for a free phone consult.