An ejaculation is an amazing process. The act of ejaculating is the foundation of the survival of our species. Perhaps that is why men seem to be so interested in it. I often feel that we have a strong primal attachment to this sexual experience. It is as if it is the ultimate display of virility.
It is no accident that the “money shot” in porn is the highly engineered ejaculation sequence. It is fascinating to me, as a person who studies human sexuality, that porn rarely displays someone ejaculating while inside another person – even though this is what occurs very frequently in everyday life.
I find that men tend to be far more fixated on ejaculation than women. For example, following prostate cancer surgery men will have dry ejaculations; there is all the sensation of ejaculation, but nothing comes out of the penis. These men often mourn the lack of ejaculation. Most of the time their partners are thrilled that sex is no longer so messy. This can cause some challenges in the relationship when misunderstandings around this arise.
Yet for many, ejaculation is a largely misunderstood process. I think it is imperative that we understand the basics of an ejaculation and what it is. As we have said earlier, orgasm and ejaculation are two entirely different events which usually occur around the same time. An ejaculation is a lower spinal cord reflex which is triggered by both physical and mental stimuli and results in the expulsion of semen out of the penis. An orgasm is a release of chemicals in the brain which results in euphoric sensation.
The ejaculation is comprised of two separate processes. The emission phase is when sperm, seminal fluid, and prostatic fluid are gathered into the urethra before the ejaculation. The ejaculation phase is the process where this mixture is expelled through the urethra and out of the penis.
It is important to understand that an ejaculation is a normal body reflex just as when the doctor hits your knee during the physical exam. If only controlling ejaculation were as simple as hitting your knee! I often talk to men about learning to control the triggers of an ejaculation. In the most simplistic terms, the triggers of an ejaculation are genital stimulation, tight pelvic muscles, tight abdominal muscles, arrested breathing, and arousal.
Any one of these triggers can cause an orgasm. For example, some men tell the story of how they experienced an involuntary ejaculation simply from visual stimulation when they were young. Most men unconsciously know how to hasten an ejaculation. They tighten their legs, they tighten their abdominal muscles, and they increase stimulation. As they get close, they either have a mental image or erotic thought which can push them over the edge. Many men talk about surfing porn sites while masturbating until they see a scene that causes them to ejaculate.
Men who have a difficult time reaching climax will try a combination of all these things to achieve ejaculation. For men who experience rapid ejaculation, we teach them to recognize and reduce as many of these triggers as possible.
Understanding how to control these triggers is the key to controlling ejaculation. Once we understand how our body works, we will be able to make more educated and informed decisions when it comes to treatment choices. If you’re experiencing premature ejaculation, delayed ejaculation or just have questions, contact us for a free phone consultation. We can figure it out together.